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The Choke

Exclusive convo: LeBron James reaches out to Kyrie Irving after season-ending injury

LeBron James Kyrie Irving

“THE CHOKE is the parody side of ClutchPoints. Everything seen and heard here is purely for entertainment and comedic purposes.”

The only thing available to you, the fan, is what’s announced publicly. It rarely amounts to much. These world-class athletes don’t only fly by defying physics, they remain extremely smart off the court as well (in this crazed media-driven world of sports).

But hey, your boy Rook Hoyle has you covered.

My sources came through with a gem as LeBron James called his former showrunner, Kyrie Irving, to express his condolences (and much more) on the awful news of his season-ending surgery that’ll surely doom the Boston Celtics 2018 NBA Playoffs run.


LeBron James: “Hey Kyrie, what up?”

Kyrie James: “Man, hey LeBron … you know what up.”

LB: “Yeah, I just heard the news, man. Hey, hold on for a sec.” (Indistinct chuckles among a few individuals in the background.)

KI: “Yo, LeBron, you have me on speakerphone? You know how I hate that. Remember that night in San Antonio? Is that people laughing? Who’s laughing? Where are you?”

LB: “Oh, no, no, man. It’s all good. Something happened on the TV. It’s just my family. We’re playing Hungry-Hungry Hippos, watching a little Netflix.”

Kyrie Irving LeBron James

KI: “Alright.”

LB: “Where are you?”

KI: “Man, I’m all messed up. Nursing this knee, getting ready for that knife on Saturday,” (referring to his season-ending surgery).

LB: ” ……. ” (Indistinct “No more Boston” chant in the background.)

KI: “Yo, is that Kevin (Love)?” Man, what the hell’s he doing there? I thought it was just your family?

LB: “Kevin? Who, Love? No. Get outta here, man. What kind of strong-ass medication they have you on already? You’re hearing things. It’s just me and my family.”

Anyway, just wanted to give a should and let you know how sorry I am about this thing. Seven-point-four seconds left in the game and you get hurt? Come on, man. In Houston. Rough, man.”

KI: “Yeah.”

LB: “Wouldn’t have happened if you just stayed in The Land.”

KI: “What?!”

LB: “Oh, you know what I mean. Just saying, I always had your back. No way your knee would have betrayed you if I was still your guy.”

KI: “What the hell are you talking about Bron?”

LB: “Anyway, I gotta get back to this ‘No More Boston’ party … yo, Kevin, pass me the Funyons!”

KI: “Yo, what?! You said Love ain’t there.”

LB: “Oh no, man. That’s (Kevin) Hart. He about to talk about that one time he and Shaq went to Cabo and they did that thing I was telling you about … ”

KI: “He playing Hungry-Hungry Hippos too?”

LB: “Good catching up. Gotta go, man. Stay healthy.”

KI: ” … ”

Your man Rook has the audio transcripts of this very conversation, but for legal reasons, it cannot be shared or embedded anywhere. The dialogue alone proves that LeBron James is not only the one of the greatest of all-time, he’s a caring individual who loves all current and former teammates.

Once a LeBron teammate, forever one.

A City Without A Team That’s About To Take Over The NBA