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New York Knicks James Dolan

The New York Knicks’ James Dolan Problem

Money can’t buy you happiness… or friends… or the ability to play music… or a good NBA franchise.

Oh, hello there, James Dolan!

For those somehow unaware, James Lawrence Dolan is the proud owner of the New York Knicks. And since he’s been in charge of everything that happens inside the World’s Most Famous Arena, things haven’t exactly gone smoothly.

It’s hilariously well-documented at this point. And it’s partially misunderstood, as Dolan is actually a hands-off owner. It’s been years since he’s meddled in the day-to-day operations of the Knicks. So much so, in fact, he’s currently being sued by MSG stockholders for spending too much time doing everything but overseeing his franchise, and the accompanying Madison Square Garden assets.

Dolan is, at best, aloof and a man who completely lacks self-awareness. He’s drawn comparisons to Donald Trump over the years, not only for his yearning to control the media narrative around him, even going as far as allegedly banning negative Knicks beat reporters from the Garden, but Dolan also believes he hit a home run after being born on third base.

Even removing comparisons to the wayside, this is the same man who once said, “I don’t know why he didn’t want New York but he clearly was not interested in playing in New York ever. For whatever reason. I can’t read his mind,” in regard to LeBron James, as if he couldn’t possibly be the reason.

Maybe LeBron already made up his mind, but to think Dolan being the owner didn’t play a part in him not wanting to play for the Knicks is like thinking dinosaurs purpose chose to get struck by a meteor.

Since then, Dolan has gone on to feud with beloved Knicks cornerstone Charles Oakley, once also banning him from MSG, as well as hurling out fans who yelled mean things toward his general direction.

To put it bluntly: Good ole James Dolan isn’t all that endearing a figure, even if he has a few traits people should enjoy.

After all, he’s a musician! Who doesn’t love a musician? Teenager me had crushes on all the musicians. Naturally, a billionaire musician who owns one of the most famous sports franchises in the world should also have a flock of groupies, right?


Eh, maybe not. Dolan has written and performed insanely awful songs about Trayvon Martin (play small video clip of this song) and how he could have been the man who stopped Hollywood sexual predator Harvey Weinstein (also play a clip of this song).

I mean… what in the world?

To be Camp Crystal Lake clear: James Dolan being a mix between a dweeb, elitist and smarmy goofball doesn’t make him a bad NBA owner. Instead, it’s that he’s an actually bad NBA owner.

James Dolan, Knicks


James Dolan once kept bringing back former Detroit Pistons star Isiah Thomas over and over again, in varying roles, despite a multitude of failures as well as sexual assault claims hanging over the 80s point god. In fact, how did Dolan react to news of his pal IT being accused of improperly treating a woman? Not only did he stand by Thomas, but he eventually handed over the keys to the New York Liberty to him.


While that should turn your tummy over a few times, here’s even more examples of the man failing to have a vision, then allowing it at least a chance to be seen through.

From 2002 through 2017, the New York Knicks have had 10 different head coaches and even more overall coaching changes if we count the numerous interim spots. But we won’t… because we’d like to not get banned from Madison Square Garden forever.

There is good news. The Knicks hired David Fizdale as head coach. He’s legitimately proven and experienced for the job he has, unlike recent front office moves Dolan has made like making Phil “Me follow the Knicks from the beach” Jackson the Czar of New York basketball, or overpaying for Derek Fisher to fail as head coach.

Yessir. Obviously a plan that will…

Ugh… OK. That didn’t work out either.

Also, you know, there’s constant rumors of him selling the team. Dolan has, repeatedly denied these reports, but it does provide Knicks fans with the only true sense of optimism they can bring to the franchise season after season.

Otherwise, uh… they’d have to hope a good owner brings out a good basketball team. And good luck with that, New York.