After watching CM Punk shout out Florida Panthers executive Roberto Luongo and declare himself “Taylor Swift for men” in an incredible segment on Monday Night RAW, the fans in Sunrise, Florida, were treated to the task at hand: Drew McIntyre versus the “Second City Saint” at Bash in Berlin.
Sure, Punk likes to have fun, and went out of his way to celebrate the fans who have supported him along the way in a decided babyface turn, but he's still excited to deliver pain to the “Scottish Warrior” with extreme prejudice in Berlin, all the while bringing out the theatrics for a truly special gimmick match.
“And that brings me to the news I have to share. You guys wanna hear the news? My biggest hater is my biggest fan, so I went ahead, and I made Drew a bracelet. And I talked to Adam Pearce, and unless Drew’s chicken, Saturday, August 31st, Berlin, Germany, Bash at Berlin, Strap Match!” Punk declared. “And for the uninitiated, that means I will be tethered to Drew like he wants so bad to be attached to me. Wrist to wrist. And you have to carry your opponent’s carcass to all four corners and touch each turnbuckle to win, but that’s not why I want a strap match. I want a strap match because I can whip this b**ch. And I can take my bracelet back. And I can leave Drew with lasting scars which he will never forget the name, CM Punk.”
With the bagpipes and war drums of his new theme, Gallantry, ringing through the arena, McIntyre marched down to the ring and gave the “Best in the World” a piece of his mind, noting that he accepts the strap match, even if he'd happily whip Punk's back right then and there.
“I’ve been thinking all week about what I’m gonna do to you. Last week, you embarrassed me, you whipped me like a petulant child, and I’ve been having all these fantasies of the violence that I’m gonna bring upon you. And you challenge me to a strap match?” McIntyre declared. “I have a question, I’m 100% serious right now, have you started drinking? Have you seen me? A strap match? I accept. But that’s next week. I can’t wait a whole week. I need a receipt for what happened to me last week. For the scars on my back. So Fort Lauderdale, you want a little teaser of McIntyre and Punk right now? You lose that strap, and let’s give them a show.”
“Lose the strap?” Punk asked “We gave them a teaser last week, I say we give them the full motion picture this week. Or I’ll tell you what, Drew. Cuz I ain’t afraid of you. I will give you this strap. You give me the bracelet.”
“No, you’re a liar!” McIntyre declared. “Last week, you lied so you could attack me from behind, you’re hypocrite, I give you the bracelet and try to get in that ring, you’ll whip me like a dog. Not a chance, but besides, April and Larry are much safer and happier at home with Drew McIntyre.”
Now, for the uninitiated, a Strap match isn't the same as a Dog Collar match – Punk's signature bout in AEW – where two wrestlers beat the bricks out of each other with a piece of leather tieing them together, but instead, a Dusty Rhodes classic where a performer has to touch all four corners of the ring in a row to secure the W, which isn't very exciting or entertaining.
Then again, considering a win seems secondary to both Punk and McIntyre when compared to delivering an absolute beating to their foe, it's safe to say this still be a violent affair worthy of your time, as the “Second City Saint” put it perfectly at the end of the segment.
“Unlike you in Berlin, who won’t be safe because it’s not me that’s attached to you, it’s you that’s attached to me,” Punk declared.
Drew McIntyre makes CM Punk look forward to Mondays
For most people, Monday is the worst day of the week, as it signifies the start of the work week, but for CM Punk, Mondays have become highly anticipated, as that's the night of the week he gets to punch McIntyre, as he hilariously told The Ringer's The Masked Men Show in a special appearance at Fanatics Fest NYC.
“No. When I go home, I have April and Larry there, and that's a completely different world. I think that maybe why [Drew] gets under my skin so much is because I feel like he's always on, and he doesn't turn it off,” Punk declared. “He's always tweeting, he's always saying something stupid on Twitter. I'm just trying to live my life at home. It grates on the nerves. It's annoying, but then I get to go to work and I get to try and punch him in the face. Mondays are a good time for me.”
Though both men spent time on the shelf so far this year with one injury or another, McIntyre and Punk have been able to consistently deliver one of the best storylines in the WWE Universe based soley on their individual statuses as certified haters. And the best part? With only their second singles match of this feud coming later this month at Bash in Berlin, there's potential for Paul “Triple H” Levesque to keep this one going for a very long time.
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